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I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word." Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word.After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and says, "I want you to send her one word: comfortable."The operator shakes his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word 'comfortable'?"The brunette explains, "My sister's blonde. The word's big. She'll read it very slowly ... com-for-da-bull."The next two are Compliments of mousepotatoesThree little old ladies are sitting on the nursing home porch talking about this and that.One holds her hands about a foot apart and says "I remember going to the store and buying cucumbers this. My best nights usually came from travelling sports teams staying at the hotel. These guys were always less shy about doing things together. It was almost as if it was a team bonding exercise to all fuck the same girl. My best night came from a team who were celebrating in the hotel bar before heading off for a night on the town. I bought a drink for one of the guys who showed me some attention and got into chat with him. Several others joined in with us until one of them started loudly proclaiming that he wanted to ‘go out and get some pussy’. I looked straight at him and asked “Why do you need to go out when there’s some right here?” There was much laughing and whooping until I stood up, announced my room number and grabbed the arm of the guy I had bought the drink for. I looked at them and asked “Who else is coming? Don’t forget to tell your friends it’s open house”. I walked my chosen one out to the lifts giggling with him all the way. We weren’t long in my.
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